Thursday, August 11, 2005

Wow, so it's almost been a full 30 days that I've been in Texas. I'd like to congratulate myself on having only one emotional breakdown! LOL. It came about 2 nights ago. I was talking with my mom and she picked it up in my voice. Then she said that they all sat down to watch Finding Nemo and it just wasn't the same. I'd told her that we were about to watch it too and we burst out crying. Women! We then began quoting lines from the darn movie!!! Yes, I am 23 and yes my Mother is a 40 something. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Any way, what else...
Ron and I have been going through a major strain. It really blows to be honest. While I was in Florida I didn't have many friends that inspired me to hang out with them or go out. I've always been a homebody but I became a hermit. I had all the time in the world to sit and wait for him to come and go offline as he pleased. Well, that's all changed and he feels like he's being slighted. We get to talk randomly when I have a few moments. If we're to be honest the only thing that's changed is the roles. Whereas he would only have sporadic moments to chat me up, I'm now the one w/ the truncated window of time for convos. He worries that I am changing, but I'm not, I'm only thriving once again. He asks if he'd fit into my life now that I am home and living freely. Of course he would. If he were here in the flesh I'd still go and hang out with friends, work 40+ hours a week and still have time for him. It's all about balance and compromise. I'm just not sure if either of us is willing to compromise fully. He speaks a lot of truths in his blog. I feel that once we're face to face we'll know if what we have is truly worth fighting for or if it was just something we got caught up with in the moment. Until our meet, I think it's too time consuming to fret over the 'what ifs' and 'what could be'.
On the homefront, the search is still in progress. We've put a few apps. in we're waiting to see which one(s) stick. Law and I are ready to go while Marciece seems to have slipped off the face of the Earth. He and I finished something that was started over six years ago and while I'm not as emotional as I thought I would be, he just might be. I thought once we got that out of the way we could co-exist happily and not have to wonder or feel the tension in the air. It is exactly how I feel, but as usual, I have no clue as to what he's feeling. Actually, I have some assumptions which I am sure are right on point, but we'll leave that alone for now.
My Godson is the most yumalicious thing in the whole world. I'm not just saying that because he's mine either. Look for yourself! I think I have a link to my photos in the "Links" section. It's under "Finally Home" album. I'm also in there as well as Ida, Lisa, Marciece, and Virgil.
That's all for now folks. I love you and miss you guys sooo much. Mami, Papi, Vero, Estevie, and Bastian-Y'all are the axis that keeps my world spinning. God bless you all!!!!

Love, Nana
Pressed by a Fairie // 7:51 PM