Hello world. How do we like the new layout? I love it, but if I can't figure out how to make this journal space larger, I am going to have to change it. I even have a top computer specialist looking into it. I guess you'll know if we've worked it out in the next week or so...There really hasn't been much to report. I haven't spoken to Rayne in a while, through no fault of my own ;P I've sent her mobile messages and emails too. LOL. Any way, tomorrow we'll be going to the beach to celebrate Memorial Day. One of the many holidays we don't celebrate consistently, but I'm not complaining. Going will be me and the other 4 members of my family, my uncle plus his 4, my cousin plus his 3, another uncle plus his 3, fof (friend of family) plus his 6, another fof plus her 3. Those keeping track, we're up to 29 peeps so far and that doesn't include any bf's that will be brought along as well as other friends...I can make one guarantee--there will be at LEAST one (if not more) Puerto Rican flag article of clothing! I already know my cousin Hex (Hector (I know, I know, that screams P.Rican)) will be wearing his P.R. hat and Jersey...sigh...can take the people out of the ghetto...LOL, I love my fam though. Who else take rice and pork to the beach? In all fairness, my mom doesn't understand why someone would take stuff that requires a fork and knife to eat to the beach. She's taking the chicken (already seasoned and pre-cooked, just needs to be seared mmmmmmm), homemade macaroni salad, and some rice (because the aunt who's bringing it doesn't like to cook to scale of the group). She'll make the same amount of food she'd make for her family of 5 for a group of 20. My mom doesn't want someone not getting any of the goods...I'm a lil' nervous about going back to the beach I raved about a couple of entries ago. It seems that last night a lady was bitten by a 2ft. shark at the very same beach. Well, she was swimming at twilight/night and that's when sharks come close to feed...so I went in search of shark safety tips, and this is what I found:--sharp teeth cut like butter - many people who have been bit don't even know it - they think a friend is pulling on their leg or arm, or squeezing them, until they realize there's no friends nearby, and the color of the water changes to red.
--sharks often bite extremities (arms and legs) so an artery is often severed, causing blood loss, shock and death rather quickly - usually one bite does it all!1. Do not wear jewelry in the water. Sharks and even barracudas love to bite at sparkly things - why do you think they make lures that way that work so well? Do you want to make yourself a lure?
2. Do not swim at twilight or at night. That is a shark's normal feeding time. Hear the dinner bell? Don't set their table for them with yourself as the main entree.
3. Get out of the water if you see schools of fish jumping. They jump to get away from a shark that's feeding on them! We observed two men here at Myrtle Beach watching the fish jumping all around them, laughing and trying to catch them, while 100 yards away, coming toward them, were two feeding sharks. Pay attention to your surroundings! The schools of fish are just the parsley on the plate if the shark runs into you in the middle of the school, right?
4. Uneven tan lines - you know those farmer tans where the shirt sleeve and socks leave the skin white? Those parts of your skin look like bait compared to the rest of you! There is a time to use instant tanning solution!
5. The color yellow - called by shark attack experts "Yum Yum Yellow". Need I say more? Okay, so contrasting colors in some of our stylish bathing suits for guys as well as for gals also make an interesting pattern that means lunch too. Look at it from a shark's view - colorful food makes for a Galloping Gourmet appetizing dish!
6. Don't stray from the group that's in the water. Just like a wolf getting the buffalo calf away from the buffalo mom, anything straying away from the "herd" is like the weakest link - then you ARE the weakest link! As in sausage link.
7. Menstruating women - blood is blood, and sharks can smell a drop of blood in water from many miles away .. keep that in mind before entering the water. A good day to make a sand castle, ladies?
8. Urinating children - any bodily fluid in the water is like the smell of apple pie wafting through the kitchen - the shark's kitchen - and everybody knows there's plenty of such fluids in the water at any public beach, and not just from kids either.
9. A drop-off next to a shallow area - sharks just love to do their grocery shopping off the shelf - how close are you to the edge of the shelf can make you a real bargain!
10. Swimming alone? Did you know even a good swimmer looks like an injured fish to a shark? We're not aquatic creatures, you know. And you've seen what sharks do to other injured sharks, haven't you? It's that weakest link again.
11. Scuba divers - near a seal colony in particular - what makes you think you DON'T look like a seal? That yum yum yellow stripe on your diving suit? Not on your life.
12. Spear fishing. Done in a scuba suit in the water, of course. Injured fish give off a chemical that to a shark is like that smell of apple pie to us - come and git it! Just ask Rodney Fox. Some divers even keep the catch of speared fish on a string on their belt while they spear more - gee, I think I'll eat the biggest fish on the string first - the diver!
13. Divers can tell you that sharks seem to be attracted to certain divers more than others - whatever scent they unknowingly give off - so some divers take chlorophyll tablets to mask their scent before they dive. It's a neutralizer that masks the human scent.
14. Think you're safe in shallow water? Most attacks take place in waist deep water or less. Remember that shark-eye view - so many legs, so little time .. Sometimes there's no reason at all that makes a shark aggressive - one case of a grandmother walking her grandson along the edge of the beach saw a dark form headed straight for them, lifted her grandson in the air, only to see a four foot shark beach itself in an attempt to bite him. As they continued their walk on the dry area of beach, several more sharks followed them 200 yards up the beach.
Tips courtesy of:
http://www.tellmewhereonearth.com/Web%20Pages/Sharks/Sharks_Page_11.htm #'s 4 & 5 are the only ones we have or should've worried about at one time or another. My brother is a skateboarder, so he has the farmer tanline from the t-shirt. Thank my stars he's alright and he evened out his tan so he's good to go for tomorrow. My father has 2 pairs of swim trunks. One of them being YELLOW!!! Granted it's a mellow yellow, but it has the dark, red, Hawaiian flower on it with blue stuff. A-MAZ-ING!!! Thankfully he packed the orange ones. LOL!!!!! Well, I should already be asleep since we're to be on the road by 6:45. Yes folks, that is A.M. Gotta reserve a few picnic tables ya know? My car has been packed (close to bursting) since 6pm tonight. (2) beach blankets, (3) body boards, (1) kid's boogieboard, (2) quad folding chairs, (2) water loungers, volleyball and net, other games, charcoal, non-perishables (cups, plates, cutlery, napkins, condiments, and cooking utensils), 6 ft. folding table, rolling grill, 10'x10' gazebo, 6 ft. beach umbrella, and the cooler will be added tomorrow! Have I mentioned how much I LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE my freaking CAR??? You couldn't get a third of that in...let's say, an '05 Mustang...ROFLMBO!!!! The rest will be placed in my mom's car. Seems like I'll be heading out first. Have fun this weekend friends (new, old, and yet to meet) and please, PLEASE be safe!!! Especially those of you in TX! Rowdy mofo's! I love you all.~Anaeli~
Pressed by a Fairie // 11:59 PM
That's what had me flat out all day. It's pretty bad when I get a migraine, it's even worse when I get a tension migraine. My doc gave me some pills to counter act the affects, but I forgot those in Tampa. I've had migraines come and go since I was about 13, but these tension ones started right before I left S.A. My hearing begins to fade out (tunnel hearing) and I go into this zombie-like stare, like I can't really move, then it passes, but pain over my left eye takes over. That type of migraine hits when I am highly stressed. Then came a new tension migraine about a year ago. Right after I got sick. I was home alone and then my right arm started going numb. My bowl started slipping from my hand. Then the tunnel hearing and then my right eye, right side of my lip, and my entire nose went numb also. It passed quickly enough so I didn't freak out too bad. Then it happened two more times and I called Alicia (Lici) to come over. We sat in the dark in my mom's room. I fell asleep and when I woke, my mom was home. That's when we visited the doc. So we're figuring that this one today was tension, from excitement. I received news that an application is on it's way from my old job, and not only is my immediate supervisor excited about my return, the GM also said he can't wait for me to return. Now that is LOVE! LOL. We figure I am just so happy-go-lucky over that, and the prospect of a job here (I'll know tomorrow), that I sent my bp up! So from about 2-now I've been in my mom's huge bed, in the dark, sleeping it off. It's actually lingering still. It hurts a bit to look at the screen. After here, I am heading back to her bed. There is nothing more soothing than your momma's bed is there? That bed protects you from aches, pains, hurts, nightmares, sickness, you name it, it handles it. Any way, I have to jet, pain. Peace. Oh and Rayne...What's up?~Sicky Faerie~
Pressed by a Fairie // 9:16 PM
At first listen, I only heard the chorus of Kelly Clarkson's Because of You song and thought, who hasn't been there. Who hasn't been burned at least once and now they 'play it safe'? Then I decided to look the lyrics up and read along while I listened to the song again and realized it isn't about a guy/girl at all! It's of a young woman, who grew up witnessing her mother's/father's relationship breaking up and suddenly found herself being the rock at a young age. This song is her stand against letting someone in and allowing them to run over her the way she perceived her 'rent(s) were walked over. It's a powerful song. Maybe I feel so deeply about it because I've been that little girl whose world was turned upside down by a nasty separation and then divorce. I'm not saying the song is an exact blow-by-blow of how I felt/feel. Just that I can definitely relate to the first few lines of the third verse. One major difference is that my mother didn't only think of herself. She may have lost her way for a little bit, and it took us (kids) banding together to bring her back. But once she was back and aware; she made it her goal to make sure we understood that just as we were first before the divorce, we'd continue to be her focal point. To reassure us that things would get better, one way or another. I can't say that at times I wasn't frustrated and moved to anger and bitterness that this was happening to my family. I can't sit here and say with a straight face that sometimes I wished to be the youngest child rather than the oldest. While my mother never bashed my father, never called him names, or spoke ill of him as a person, she did speak to me about how she was feeling. How the situation made her feel. Which many young kids might've been sucked in and in turn made their parent's bitterness their own. I knew better. While I had my own reasons for hating my father, at that time, they weren't because of the things my mother purged. They were my own. There were times when I didn't want to hear her words, words that seemed to be the, same day in and day out. Looking back, it was a natural response/reaction for a teen. The monotony of it all got to me. I would give her my opinions, my view as the outsider of the relationship she had with my father. How she was better off. I firmly believe that to this day. There were times when she seemed to get it. She would sit there and say to me the things I'd been saying to her. She was strong and she didn't need him. Then she'd backslide into some sort of cocoon and it would seriously piss me off. Especially when she seemed surprise by his callousness. It pissed me off that she'd let him back in and get all angry again when he hurt her. I look back and see that it's easy for someone who hasn't had children and built a life with a man they love to pass judgment. Well, not pass judgment so much as just get down right angry. It was easy for me to see the path she should take and easier for me to get angry when she'd digress. Wow, here I just meant to write an opening for the new song...I guess that's what this blog is for, a place to put down your thoughts. My mother has read my blog before. We discussed one of the entries (Men!!!) because she commented that it made her sound stupid. I felt a moment of guilt and then I buried it. I wasn't going to feel guilty for what I wrote, because it's my truth, it's how I saw things when I was a teen and I am/was just putting it out there. I explained to her that it's how it seemed to me when I was younger. The full truth is, we talk about those women everyday. We hear stories or see them on TV of women who are devastated when the man walks out on them. How they're lost and don't have a clue as to what comes next. It's nothing to be ashamed of because there are millions of people out there today who go through the same situation. She had two strikes against her from birth. 1) She was born a woman and 2) She was born a Latin woman. Either way she'd have been raised to cater to a man. That's what women back then did. Especially the Latinas. I regret that she misunderstood my entry, but I also hope that it opened her eyes. That she sees what we saw. That she understands that I sing her praise every day. It's one thing to be born and bred to do one thing and to actually fall prey to those expectations, and it's a totally different thing to break free from that mold. It did take my mom some time to realize she could do bad by her damn self, and even now she has her doubts about some things and let's him get away some others, but she's up on his game. She knows the game and anticipates his next move. I can't sit here and naively say that due to what I've been through that I don't have walls in place. I don't blame anyone for them because the truth is, they go beyond what my parents went through. My wall didn't just build itself, I layed the bricks one by one. It saddens me to admit that, yet I figure I can't be too far gone if I am aware of it and can speak about it. Oh and things are better between my father and us children. I've forgiven, but I'll never forget. Any way, my arm is starting to hurt. So here are the lyrics and the ones that are in bold letters are the ones I can relate to; the chorus holds no weight and neither does the outro chorus:
"Because Of You"
{V:1}*I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did,
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far
{Chorus}
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me,
but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
{V:2}I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because you know that's weakness in your eyes
**I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with
{Chorus}
{V:3}***I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid
Because of you
Because of you
* I don't want you thinking that I'll never let anyone in and that it's all your fault. Just that as the old saying goes, "we learn from our mistakes." Those mistakes weren't my own, but I have taken a lesson away from the event. You and I know I am much too full of love to never allow myself the opportunity to lavish it upon someone and vice versa.
**I did force smiles to the world because I didn't know any other way of coping at the time. My way of dealing with stressful situations is to turn them into something humorous. And I have to say, I like that about myself, as do others.
***I did watch you die and it did hurt to hear you cry yourself to sleep, but I also watched you rise from that despair. I watched you rebuild yourself, with a little help from three Earth Angels. You exemplify everything I hope to be one day. A force to be reckoned with. A woman who may not always be sure of the next step, but is always willing to take it. Come what may. I only pray that I have a 1/4 of the courage and strength you have. You may say you're not courageous, you just react to what is given to you. That is the very definition. You may say you're not strong, you're just trying to survive. That too is the very definition. You Mom, are the embodiment of Maya Angelou's Phenomenal Woman.
~Lady Apprentice~
Pressed by a Fairie // 7:15 PM
...is now my favorite beach in all of Florida (at least the parts that I've visited). We arrived at the beach at 1:46 p.m. We left at 7:55 p.m. In between we had a flipping blast. "We" consisted of my brother, my gmom, and myself as well as my cousin Hector and his 3 kids-Ileana, London, and Nathaniel, London's brother (also named Nathaniel), Hex's gf Jessica and her son Anthony...did I mention Jess is 7 months preggers? LOL. Oh and Jessica's friend Christina. I know what you're thinking...those of you who know that I have a low-tolerance for children. How did Ileana have fun with sooooo many kids running around? I'll tell you. And NO the answer is NOT that they were family, cause that doesn't mean a thing. The fact is that Hex's kids act like kids. Meaning they were loud and energetic, and at times demanded full attention, but they never threw a tantrum, cried, or whined. I can't stand kids who are/act like brats. There is a difference. We loaded up the cars with coolers that we loaded up and headed out. Traffic was a snitch. Understandable though because H.S. grads were out celebrating and enjoying the wonderful weather too. This beach was amazing. Normally we travel to Clearwater Beach, which is only 6 mins. from the beach Hex took us to. I don't remember if I ranted about the UNavailable parking during "season" at Clearwater Beach. But it's horrible. If you want to be in the water by noon, you need to get there by 10 so you can spend 2 hours trying to park! Any way, Sand Key Beach had ample parking and was FAAAAAAAARRRRRR from being crowded!!! Hex had told me that it was more of a place families went so we wouldn't have to deal with all the "hardbodies" and stuff. He was right. I would be shocked if there were more than 120 people there. I figured it too would be packed since it was a Saturday and we arrived at peak swim time. We found a prime spot to set-up our beach blankets and etc...and while we had people on all sides of us, we weren't sitting on top of one another. My most fave thing about the beach is that the sand is heavily mixed with sea shells, making it 1) easier to walk back and forth on and 2) allowed for food and drinks to be consumed w/o having the nasty gritty sand mouth problem. I freaking made ham and cheese sandwiches for everyone, using mayo and must and not ONE person bit into a grain of sand. LOVED IT!! Oh and even with it being fairly windy, the blankets stayed sand-free, until one of the kids forgot to walk around...We threw the football around, played a little volleyball, tried to get a game of badminton going, but the wind was reeking havoc on the shuttlecock and played with the velcro pad/ball thingy...you'd know it if you saw it. Afterwards we decided to head to CiCi's Pizza. It's the cheapest way to feed 11 people and semi-vegetarian. All of us at for less than $55!!!! Can you believe that? My family of 5 ordered the family meal deal from Pizza Hut earlier this week and for $35 we got 2-med. pizzas, 10 breadsticks, and 20 wings, oh and a liter of Pepsi. That's only for FIVE people. Any way, even at dinner the kids were mag! No arguing, no throwing food, actually they had better manners than most adults I've been out to eat with. 2 of the kids ate a salad first, then asked if they may have pizza. After that, they ALL asked if they could have refills and if they could get dessert. I'm not saying that they NEVER have their moments, but I'm glad they know that they're NEVER to have a "moment" while out in public. Then again, my cousin doesn't play. He's firm but fair.
Any way, my skin has been kissed by the sun. I've gone from honey-coated chocolate to coffee w/ the slightest splash of cream.I enjoy getting to go darker for the summer. It's a nice contrast from my usual tone. I loooove the summer for that! Any way, I am about dead asleep as I am typing this, so I am going to step 3 feet to the right of this here computer and fall into my bed. Hopefully not a single person disturbs me for at least the next 10 hours!
~Brown Skin~
Pressed by a Fairie // 11:59 PM
Just thought I'd change up the music a bit. Mainly because Amerie will be releasing Touch as her next single. Plus, I was tired of it already. LOL. Now playing is a variation/remix of Gwen Stefani's If I was A Rich Girl. I like it because the lady who sings the chorus has a great voice plus I like the island flavor that was added by the lady reggae star. Perhaps it's Lady Saw? I'm not sure since this song just fell into my lap one day ;) ;) Any way, not much to report. I visited the local post office today to send a package off to my Afghan Man, Steel. I would tell you what I sent, but then he'd know too. It's a surprise. Once he's received it I'll gush and maybe post some pics. Well, I am a little under the weather, so I am going to place myself on the family room futon and soak up some soaps...Woah! While flipping through the channels I landed on BET and saw a video by some female named Moshonda. I have a few bones to pick, 1) the song is crap, 2) What was the costume designer thinking??? The tunic she wears has been worn...by Mariah Carey in the We Belong Todether video and one of the dancers is wearing the black bodysuit Ciara wore in the Goodies video, and 3) her make-up artist could've/should've done better.
Moving on, Bow WOOOOOW!!! I caught his new video called Let Me Hold You and my oh my has the once cute lil' boy transformed into a seriously hot young man. I don't know how I feel about his tattoos (cause he just turned 18 and has had them since he was 16...) but he's hot. Oh and the song is nice too. Sure wish my name was Demi Moore right about now...
~Island Flavor~
Pressed by a Fairie // 1:38 PM
I know I joke around alot about me being on the selfish side, but I hope people realize that it's all in jest. I'm not going to sit here and spout off all the things I've done or still do to prove otherwise. When I say I'm selfish I mean in a relationship capacity and I am speaking about love, time, and attention. Even that's a joke. The truth is, all I want is someone who will put into the relationship what I put in. There will be none of the "my love will be enough to carry us both" crap. Because that's all that is-crap. Been there done that. Sometimes we may have to work a little harder in the relationship, but that goes for both partners. Usually people get by by maintaining a relationship. Which is great for them. Regular maintenance keeps a car going so it makes sense. Just like a car, a relationship may need some work from time to time. That kind of work doesn't scare me and I don't mind. It's part of the process and it's a necessary action if you want to keep what you have. I don't need to be doted on, lavished with gifts, wined and dined, told 100x's a day that I am loved. I can easily take myself to dinner and a movie and have done it before. I usually purchase my own jewelry because at the end of the day I revel in my small show of independence. That and the fact that I'll never have to hear someone throw a (major) purchase in my face in the heat of anger. I only need a smile that makes me melt, eyes that light when they rest upon me, one look that will burn me to my soul, a mind that never shuts off and challenges me often, a touch that sends tremors through my system, and laughter on a regular basis. Really, is that too much to ask? What's funny is, if you tell a man or lead him to believe that you need to be kept, most men will act accordingly and have no problems. Tell a man that you don't need those things and all you need is him, and he seems lost. Men are so used to using money to show/prove who they are that they lose themselves. I am man. I am breadwinner. I am head of house. Blah-blah-blah. They can't fathom that a lady might actually prefer a spur-of-the-moment poem scrawled on some construction paper to a hallmark card with the gold seal closure. I do have to throw in that there are those women out there who are only out for a man and is monetary status, but when you have a lady who tells you she doesn't need all those things, pay attention and take heed. She's not saying she never wants to go out and dine at a restaurant or receive flowers for no reason, etc...she's just saying that it's not the only way to show you love and appreciate her.
Okay, now that I've gotten all that out of the way, I am happy to report that I am happy. LOL. There's a certain someone who gives me pretty much all the things I've listed above. Of course, he can only do so much being so far away, but you get the picture. Life is so much easier when you're on speaking terms with the ones you love. We hit a rough patch, twice now actually. We understand that being so far apart, and having only known each other a few short weeks prior to the separation, has added to our stress. We only give when we feel the other person is giving. Let that shift a little and we're both scared to take the next step. Right now it feels like there are so many obstacles that await us when he returns. The most major being that I am moving to Texas (I'm in the process of convincing him to look into S.A.). Other than that, I think we can work through or compromise on the other things. What sucks is that none of that can be done until he's home, for good. Which won't be until sometime in April 2007. Steel is hoping to get his leave for the end of June. I am hoping he'll push his leave date back by 2 weeks. He's been doing it since his leave was due (Late April/early May) so what's 2 more weeks. Why is it so important for him to catch leave around July 11th? Because that is my last official day here in Florida. After July 11th, I'll be free to leave. I am looking at a target date of July 17th. Hopefully Steel can join me on my drive down to San Antonio. This way we get to spend time with one another and he gets a first-hand look at San Antonio. We can delve into some research and find out about the kind of military/computer work is available...I can even take him to visit the Alamo. He recently saw the movie, The Alamo, and in his own words (taken from Y! IM) "what about the Alamo? i saw the movie a number of days ago...it was really inspiring" Hehehehe. He really is so very cute. We spoke last night for almost 3 hours. That burned up 167 mins. of his calling card. Our conversation just flows and even when it doesn't we're content to just be. I just found out that a song he wrote and posted on his blog was written with me in mind. It's called fleeting. If you go hunting for it, you'll have to go back to March 26, 2005. The man is a freaking master manipulator of the English language. He moves me with words in a way that leaves me awestruck. In the words of singer Heather Headley, He is...
Now that I've gotten all of that out, I am going to hit the bed for another hour or so. I was up early cause I had to go and feed my neighbors HUGE FREAKING dog. Cody is really very sweet. He never barks and he's quite playful. My fear stems from any animal that stands taller than me on their hind legs. That was not a short-joke door being left open either! Have fun.
~Bedtime Bear~
Pressed by a Fairie // 9:23 AM
That's what this place is doing to me. I am going crazy here. By here, I don't mean my home, but the area in which my home is located. The friends I've made here don't seem to understand my plight. I've tried to explain to them the odd looks and the uncomfortable feeling of being watched wherever I go. All because I'm not lily. They don't understand me because they've grown up in this little town. In San Antonio, if you needed gas, it didn't matter where you were, you just pulled over, pumped, and paid. Be it in the ritzy area or the ghetto, I never felt out of place or unwanted. I find myself scouting out the gas stations before I pull in. I make sure that there aren't too many people because my nerves tend to bunch up. Remember my story about the guy who has practically covered his mobile home in swastika flags? Well, it seems those weren't enough for him. He has made a HUGE, free-standing one out of wood, and has it erected on some sort of pole. It's like a freaking McDonald's sign, only they're not serving up food, just hatred! Ugh! Today I learned what it is exactly that bothers my mom about me going out at 12, 1, or 2 in the morning. Her reaction perplexed me because she's never opposed my night-life before. It turns out that she's fearful that I will be out somewhere and I'll run into some people who'll want to take their racism/prejudice out on me. Totally understandable. I am just soooooo happy that she and I are finally on the same page. She and my father have been pushing me to get a job. The way I see it, it makes no sense to get a job when I am leaving in a month. They know how I am about starting something and then not following through. I am such a creature of habit and stability. I'm not saying I hate change, but I will fight it as long as I can. I get attached and excited about/by a job and then I settle in. Once I am settled, I don't want to move. I guess a psychiatrist would say that my issues stem from all the moving around we did when I was younger. Which would make sense to me. Any way, I was on the phone w/ Ida and discussing my options and how I think it's stupid to get a job now, and she agreed. No sooner did the words come out of my mouth, did my mother come in and say the exact same thing. "Ileana, it would be stupid for you to get a job, all you need is what $400-$500 for gas and "just in case" right?" "Yes mom." "So, then when this thing w/ you sister is over (July 11th maybe sooner), we'll send you out." "THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING!!!" Even my dad agreed when we broached the topic over dinner. His comment was simply, "Yeah, you're only taking your clothes and stuff right now, until you get your apt. and then I'll drive your furniture down." EXACTLY PEOPLE!!! SHEESH! LOL. I love them both soooo much. Gonna miss them. Not going to miss the drama around here though. That's for darn sure. Not drama between them, cause there's hardly any, but from a third-party family member. I'm so excited and nervous that my time is almost upon me that I made myself sick today. How about that? Things are finally going my way and I get a migraine (which I haven't gotten in a while) and nausea! I went and got my oil changed today. Sure wish my car wasn't synthetic only, it would've saved me about $15 today. Tomorrow I am going to get air bags installed. Both the driver's and the passenger's. Which will only leave my front passenger wheel cylinder that needs afixin' and my car will be in traveling condition. I can not wait to drive back home. Anytime we went on vaca we traveled by car. It's such a beautiful and eye-opening experience. I love traveling through all the different towns and catching glimpses of all sorts of cultures and traditions. Just lovely. I think tomorrow I am also going to pick up some boxes and start packing up all of fairies and such. Strip the room down to the bare necessities, i.e. bed, pc, tv, dvd/vcr, stereo, clothes. LOL. My bare necessities and those of people who lived a century ago differ by various degrees. Times sure have changed.
Oh, before I forget, Rayne...will you be in ATL towards the end of June-Mid July? I figured I could detour from my route long enough to visit you and meet Mr. Watts...and maybe, just maybe while I'm there, we can all catch a Braves game. I would LOVE to go to a Braves game. Granted, my Puerto Rican (Javy Lopez) and my (David) Justice aren't there anymore, but good ol' Chipper is still! Oh YEAH, have you spoken to B. Jones lately? Is he still in Missouri or did he come back home? And are you still in touch with Windell? Just want to know how they're doing. I miss the heck out of them. B's smile and sometimes almost soft-spoken manner and Windell and his loud-mouth, goofy butt! Let me know the deal, alright Miss 1 Year? See you soon (YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY).
~Homeward Bound~
Pressed by a Fairie // 11:59 PM
Boy, this has been a week filled with new experiences. As stated in the previous entry, I cut most of my hair off and I am STILL loving it! The response from all who've seen me has been positive. Even Rayne said she liked it. Well, I believe her first words were, "What'd you do?" Turns out Ms. Thang has been wanting to cut her hair off too, but her daddy would kill her, and after him, the rest of her fam. Now she can live vicariously through me. LOL! Anyway, also on Weds. Mami and I shopped for my sister's B. Day gifts. Never send more than ONE Rivera lady to the mall at one time. Unless you don't care that they'll run through money quicker than Mario Andretti on a race track...Thursday while shopping for gift wrapping and B. Day cards I came up with the idea to throw a surprise party for Vero. We figured we could celebrate on Sun. since it was Mother's Day. Go for the 2 for 1 deal. We decided on a Tiki Party theme. Keeping the party under wraps wasn't too hard cause I've got an excellent poker face and an even better "huh?" look. It also helped that I was going camping from Fri-Sun. Michelle invited us (Me, Ryan and Erica) to go camping over the weekend. We went to Juniper Springs, in Ocala. About 2.5 hours from home. I'll have pics up soon. We had a freaking blast. I met so many new people. Great people (at least in the camping environment). There were 27 of us all together. We had 5 campsites. Everyone pretty much hung out at ours because we were on the same site as Michelle's sister (Melissa) and her husband (Dan). Everyone contributed to the food and drinks and DRINKS. Man oh man. Friday we got into the town around 1ish. We stopped off at the liquor store. Out of the 2 cars and 8 people, only 3 of us were of age to purchase alcoholic beverages (HAHA). So Dan and I were the lucky 2 elected to go in and buy the good stuff. Dan was happy that he wasn't going to have to go in and buy all of it by himself. After the quick stop we reached camp around 2ish, set up the tents, and unloaded all the other goodies from both vehicles. Afterwards we took a trip to the local store (about 20 miles away) and picked up some last minute items. You know, things like oreos and stuff. Slowly others started arriving and we quickly got a game of spades going. I LOVE playing with people who are just as competitive as I am, because when you beat them, it feels even better! LOL. Word to the wise, don't begin a game if your partner has been drinking. You'll just end up frustrated like I was!!! Afterwards, we began mixing drinks and went on a tour of the grounds. We ended up at the stream. Very beautiful. Michi and Danielle stuck their feet in, the rest of us just walked around and explored it a bit. We quickly learned that the campsite had madd ticks. Now I know most of you are like, "DUH!" right now, but I've been camping before and NEVER had to worry about ticks. We attributed it to the fact that on Thursday it had rained. We also found that when we were under trees is when everyone noticed ticks. Thank God I didn't get hit as bad as others. I only found ticks twice. Once when I woke up Sat. morning and once again after I got home on Sunday and neither of them had embedded their heads in me yet. Another trip was made to buy MORE Off! spray cause we were going through the little stash we had very quickly. Matter of fact, Robbie denied my offer to spray him down and later when he found a tick on his balls we caught him not only applying the wipes but spraying as well. LMAO. So the guys were extra paranoid about having tickcock and the ladies were concerned with ticks everywhere else. One of the babies did get a tick on him that went unnoticed cause it was under his shirt so our tick doc (Christina (Robbie's GF)) had to pry it out with some tweezers. Ouch, I know, but the baby was quiet as a mouse. Actually, he was quiet the ENTIRE time we were camping. He was so content to chill in his play pen. He always had a smile on his face and if you touched him he began bouncing with joy. The kid would even burst out in random laughter. When I encounter little ones like him, I think if only all were that quiet and self-contained, I'd have one. Oh well...so Fri. night was spent playing cards and eating and drinking burr. I've never seen so much beer consumption in all my life!!! Seriously, the tolerance these people have is amazing. All you heard was "can you get me another beer?" "Which cooler is the beer in?" and only half of the group was there. Ryan, Erica and I didn't drink much. I think we had a drink each. Saturday was a whole other story. The liquor was free flowing that night. No one was thinking about ticks cause everyone was pretty wasted. Ryan entertained us all with his guitar playing and singing. Michelle's dad joined in with his guitar and they had us all dancing and singing. The park ranger came by and told us we had to keep it down. Naughty us. Oh yeah, earlier during the day we went to an area designated for canoeing. I didn't canoe, but we did wade in the water. We found quicksand spots. That was freaking cool. My legs sunk up to my knees. Trying to get out was the fun part. Ryan, Erica, and I sipped on Tequila Sunrises the whole night, mixed in were a few shots of Senor Jose Cuervo, as well as a few Malibus on the rocks and some Hillbilly Brew. Not quite sure what's in the stuff since it's a homemade concoction. I noticed a hint of Bicardi O, but that was it, it tasted like an iced t, very yummy. The three of us had found a hill on Friday and decided to go back to it Sat. night hang out there for a while and check out the stars. Pretty darn amazing. The hill was in the center of this empty area and no trees were around. Thank goodness, cause as gone as I was, I was still worried about ticks, just not as neurotic as I'd been the previous night. We talked mostly about life and friendship and my upcoming move. It's going to be pretty hard to leave when the time comes. The peeps I've met here are really great. It's going to hurt alot. After about 1.5 hours on the hill we headed back to camp and noticed an aroma in the air. One that hadn't been present before...which meant Mike showed up as well as Michi's brother. "Whataburger" was freely passed around and the festive mood continued well until about 6 in the a.m. Sunday found us breaking camp at 8:30 am, yup 2 hours after going to bed. Most of us woke up still buzzed. We got back home by noon, First thing first, I showered and then had to go get some last minute items for Vero's party. People were due around 4. Dad went to Tampa to get our Grandmother and Veronika was just chillin' around the house. Having no clue as to what was going on. No clue that her helping my mom clean around the house was actually in preperation for her party. That was the best part of the whole thing. I love giving surprises just as much as I enjoy receiving them. The party went off as planned. We spent about 3 hours listening to music, eating chips, cake, and ice cream. She opened her gifts and then the party broke up. As most of them had dinner plans with their fams. Mom and Gmom cleaned up and off to dinner we went ourselves, to celebrate Mother's Day. After we got home I sat my mom and gmom down and played the Boyz II Men song, A Song for Momma, only it was their Spanish version. They both cried. Which means they enjoyed it. My Grandma even asked for a copy of the song. So in a few mins. here, I am going to hunt for some more of their songs in Spanish. I know they're out there because they did a Spanish version of their cd Cooleyhighharmony. That's why I love B2M sooo much. They're so versatile. Wish they'd put out a cd with the same kind of content as they used to. Their last 2 albums were pretty much crap...Any way, I am out for now. Peace.~Lady~
Pressed by a Fairie // 12:39 PM
Today @ 3:00 p.m., the change took place. You can take a look by clicking the link off to the right entitled: Photos of a Scorpio. Once there, look for the album entitled: My New Look. Yup, I took myself to my stylist, Frank, and he took my hair to the chopping block. I know Scott is throwing a party at the pics! He's been suggesting I cut my hair for two years now (he likes short hair). Everyone so far has loved it. At least to my face. Mouth loved it and so did a few others I trust (to tell me the truth). My mother is soooo happy. Apparently this look is what she's ALWAYS wanted to do to me. But, in her words, I've "always been so finicky." Well, I went with my gut and I am happy. At first, everytime I heard the scissors open and close, my tummy went all tight with nerves. Especially when Frank cut near my ears. The sound of my curls falling to the wayside was a trip. He knows what he's doing. Thank goodness, cause all I said was that I wanted to go short. Actually, even this is still a bit long. I was going for the hair the same length ALL the way around my head. Like, just have a mass of curls, and no pony tail. I can't wait until Rayne gets to a PC cause she has no idea yet. She thinks I got a tattoo. HAHAHAHA. I called her to see if her phone would accept a pic from my phone and unfortunately, it doesn't. She even called back twice to try and get my change out of me. The closest she's come to the hair assumption is that I did something asinine, like go platinum blonde or something. I'll keep you posted, and those of you whom I email the album to, let me know what you think.
Pressed by a Fairie // 10:38 PM
Those who own India.Arie's first cd will understand why that subject line sounds so familiar. It's the very last line of the Intro. Change is coming my way. Rayne, you might actually go nuts if I tell you what I will be doing in about two weeks. Please don't fret, it won't be anything illegal or dangerous. LOL. I'm bold, but not crazy. Hehehehe. Mouth, hopefully you'll come with me. I'll need a friend there so I won't chicken out...although, mom will be there. She's got full artistic discretion. I guess I should probably tell you about it first huh Mouth? I'll call you tomorrow and fill you in. Rayne, I will wait and send a pic after the fact. I love ya! Moving on...The 3 days I spent in Tampa at my Grandmother's was great! My sister tagged along and we actually got along for those few days. When we got there we decided to dine at our fave Mexican restaurant, El Rincon. MMMMMMMMMM!!! That's Mexican food like back in Texas. The BEST part, it is RIGHT across the street from my Gmomma's! After dinner, we walked back and we played cards and dominoes. Gmom was at work (she's a home health aide). Saturday morning I went and picked her up. The rest of the day was spent shopping here and there, cooking, and playing some more bones and cards. We even wrangled our abuela into playing bones AND go fish with us. LOL. She did pretty good for herself. While she didn't come close to my bone score, she beat me at go fish. You can bet your bottom I was trying to beat her too! We brewed a pot of hazelnut coffee and off to dreamland we went. Well, sort of. I played my GBA for a while, and then started a book. Vero talked the night away with Mikey. Sunday found us making breakfast, doing more shopping, and then lazing away until around 8:30 pm. Vero and I went bowling. $1.50/game!!! We were freaking ecstatic. Veronika and I found our lane, entered our bowling names (Jazzmine and Raine), and began our first game. Jazz was up first and after she bowled her two bowls, one of the 3 (older brown) gentlemen came over, grabbed Jazz by her arm and said, "Come here Sugah..." He went on to explain (what we've ALL tried to explain to her), that you are to use the arrows when bowling and yada yada. Even the guy using the other lane beside us was rooting for her. I know at one point, during the first game, after she bowled he asked if she used the arrows and we all burst out laughing. From that point on he was her champion. Encouraging her when it was her turn, hi-fiving her when she did well, and cracking on her when she guttered. Let me tell you, it worked, because the girl who has never bowled over a 30 something, bowled a 70 that game. The next game she bowled about the same, but on our third game she blew up. The game ended with her at 110 and me at 111. I only eeked it out thanks to 2 strikes in the 10th frame plus knocking down 8 of the 10 pins on my final turn!!! Pure luck I tell ya. She shined that night! We had a blast. Did I mention that the bowling alley is right across from our Gmom's place too? We're thinking of making it a weekend thing. After bowling we went home and did our own thing. I broke night finishing my book and she broke night by talking to Mikey. Today wasn't too eventful.. We woke late in the day and decided to head to the b. alley to play some air hockey before we head home. So here I am, about to search for plane tix to NY. Nope, not for me. I wish. For Vero of course...so she can go visit her man for her b.day. She'll be 19 on the 10th of this month. She shares her birthday with my mom's mom and I share my birthday with my mom's dad. Cool huh? Maybe I'm just a nerd. Any way, peace... ~Lady Chance~
Pressed by a Fairie // 11:55 PM
